Happy habits is based on the simple idea of using our innate ability to bless to help us break out of habits of unhappy thinking and feeling. We simply replaces habits, of negativity, regret, worry and anger with a habit of blessing.
There are three main happy habits:
1. Bless People. every time you think of someone bless them.
2. Bless Times: every time you think of a situation either in the present, from the past, or in the future, bless it.
3. Bless Places: every time you think of a place bless that place.
You can start right now by thinking of someone you like and mentally blessing them. Think something like “May they be deeply happy. May they do well. May good things come their way”.
If someone you don’t like comes to mind, even if it is someone who is giving you a hard time (or gave you a hard time in the past) bless them too. Anyone who is giving other people a hard time is not truly happy in themselves. If they were truly happy they would nicer to everyone. Bless them. Something like, “May they be deeply happy and free to share happiness with others. May they feel so blessed that they want to share blessings with others. May so much kindness come their way that they delight in being kind to others”.
For example, someone said something a bit rude to me the other day. It was not someone I ever liked very much, and I noticed it was easy for me to think of him every so often and feel annoyed at what he said. I have done enough forgiveness work to realise what a waist of time and energy it was to resent the guy. Besides, he has a bit of mental problem, so he cannot help himself and there is nothing I can really do to resolve it with him. I could have done the Four Steps to Forgiveness exercise, but for a change I just decided to bless him instead. Now every time I think of him I switch from being resentful to sending him a blessing. “May his mind be still and at peace. May he feel deeply happy and content. May he happily share happiness with others.”
A fun thing about this is that anything we try and bless others with also comes to us too, so I feel better when I do this – much better – and some peace of mind comes to me too.
If the person you are thinking about is someone you deeply miss then bless with: “Thank you for all the goodness which comes to me/came to me through _____. May he/she be happy and feel blessed. May his/her capacity for sharing happiness with others grow and grow.” Even if you have to do this with tears in your eyes, it will help to heal you.
Every time you think of a situation you were once in, notice a situation you are in, or think about a situation you are going to be in, bless it.
If it was a situation you were once in that you liked, rather than regretting it has gone, mentally say “Blessings on that situations. Thank you for all the goodness that come to me from it. May such goodness come again in whatever form is suitable now.” Also bless all other involved, “May they be blessed and their capacity for sharing happiness grow and grow”.
It is was a situation you were once in that you did not like or had mixed feelings about, you can do it this way, “Thank you that I have moved on from ___. May all others involved grow in the happiness and grow in sharing happiness”.
If it is a situation where you regret things you did or said, “May all in that situation, or effected by that situation be blessed. May any harmful things said or done, by myself or others, be transformed. May we all grow in our ability to share goodness and happiness”.
If it was a situation you are in now, look around and mentally say, “May this situation be blessed.” Depending on whether others are present or not bless them, or if only you are present bless yourself; “May I/everyone present be happy and fulfilled. May goodness fill my/our lives. May whatever passes be for the highest good.”
If it is situation which will happen in the future, say “May this situation __ be blessed. May it all work out for the highest good. May all involved grow in happiness and the ability to share happiness.”
Every time you think of a place bless it.
If you had a hard time there, or it was a mixed experience, try “Bless that place. May all that occurred there turn into a blessing and work out for the good.” If relevant add, “May the people I met there all grow in happiness and their ability to share happiness”.
If you had a good time there, and especially if wishing you were back there, “Bless that place. May all the good I experienced there extend from me to touch the live of others.” If relevant add, “May the people I met there all grow in happiness and their ability to share happiness”.
That’s it! That is a simple easy way to break out of old unhappy thoughts and develop your ability to bless at the same time.
Will it make your fears, annoyances, and worries vanish in an instant? Maybe not at the start, but with practise you will get better and better and at some point you will be able to banish them in an instant.